Tag: Grinberg

Lady Wrap Star: Batsheva!

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Lady Wrap Stars13 Comments
Meet this week’s lady wrap star, Batsheva.  Batsheva hails from the beautiful land of Israel, and has some very unique insights about hair covering to share!  She welcomes any questions we might have about her post, and will answer all comments!
[Tichel=the Yiddish word for head scarf.]
batsheva lady wrap star wrapunzel
Hi!  What do people usually call you?  
 My name is Batsheva Tova. I use my middle name often, but most people call me Batsheva. There is quite a story behind it. My father fought in the 1982 Lebanon war and lost 7 of his friends. When I was born in October ’83, he named me after them (sheva=seven in Hebrew).

How long have you been covering your hair?
I have been covering since I got married, 8 1/2 years ago. My mother covers her hair, so I always knew I would too.
What kind of climate do you live in?  How has this affected how you cover?
I live in the beautiful Golan Heights in the north of Israel (y’all are welcome to visi!) The winters here are quite cold in local terms, and I tend to wear more ostentatious arrangements in the winter. Summers are boiling hot and therefore minimalistic.
batsheva lady wrap star wrapunzel
Have you always covered your hair with scarves?
Mostly scarves. I had a couple of hats when I got married, but they didn’t last long. When I am not in the mood, I wear berettes.

Have you changed how you cover your hair over time?
Oh, yes. When I was newly married, the tichels and the way to wear them were very different. The tichels were all made of thickish cotton, and were monochromatic. No patterns, unless a gradual hue counts.We used to tie them in various “Rachel Imenu” styles; We wore square-triangles and we switched the ends behind our head and across the forhead. Some took one end under the hair and the other one over it. We sometimes did it with two tichels, one was the cap on top and the other one went around it. If anyone ties them this way today, they look very dated. When the scarves first came out, we use to tie them in a special way too, creating a kind of sack holding our hair and going above it. There were other covers too. There was a time when women wore small hats and wrapped their hair in black fabric like a black snake down their back. I saw a woman doing that the other day and thought:”Boy, we were peculiar”. Today, many women here wear “designed” tichels which are sewn from several fabrics with laces and decorations on them. They cost at least four times the price of a plain scarf.  Back when I started wearing them, there were only square-folded-into-triangle type tichels. I must sound like a tichelosaurus. If you ever do a retro-tichel post, I would be happy to demonstrate!
batsheva lady wrap star wrapunzel
Can you share with us some advice about the technique of hair covering? 
I always wear a tricot (tshirt material) triangle tichel under anything I put on. It prevents slippage and gives a nice smooth shape to my head.

What is the most important thing you have learned/realized from covering your hair?
Honesly? To always be comfortable. The rest doesn’t matter. And also to follow your belief. I believe that I should cover all of my hair, even though around me most women do the ponytail-out look.
How did you figure out how to wrap your scarves so beautifully?
A LOT of trial and error,and also jealousy of my sister. She has only been married for 9 months and is already a Ph.D. level tichelist. And obviously this site and Rivka-Malka’s one have inspired me.
How do you wash/care for your scarves?
Most of them are hand-wash only. I also fold them an extra fold in the front so they stretch a little less over my forehead. I included a photograph of the AMAZING tichel cupboard my husband got me for my birthday. The drawers underneath store my pins, brooches, lace ribbons etc.
batsheva lady wrap star wrapunzel
What are some of your recommendations that you would give someone with your hair type, face shape, colouring etc.?
I am quite pale, but lucky enough to be olivish toned. Most colours look good on me. The only colour that I should really keep away from my face is black. I don’t like black, so this is rarely an issue for me. In my experience, black tichels make pale women look sick and swallow up the dark-skinned ones.
My face is roundish and quite full, so I like volume in my tichels. If there isn’t enough volume, I feel I look like a balloon, or a bald person!
My hair has nothing unique about it, just a wavy brown. I do recommend keeping it long – it helps holding up the whole thing. I know a girl with very frizzy long hair, and she doesn’t need a volumizer or an extra scarf or anything – if some of you disliked your frizzy hair, you’ll have a lot of fun when you start covering. For extra volume I use big velvet scrunchies on myhair, and also use a special sponge shaped like a bagel which is quite popular here.
One more pointer – I have a big head, so I always try to get the longest scarves/biggest squares, otherwise I have to work really heard to make them fit…
batsheva lady wrap star wrapunzel
What do you love most about covering your hair?
I love having this neon sign on my head declaring that I am an observant Jew and a lawfully wedded wife.
To me head coverring is as much a part of tzniut as wearing a shirt is.
On a more materialistic view, I feel it help sme complete my outfit and make a match between garments that wouldn’t go together without it.
batsheva lady wrap star wrapunzel
What is your favourite way to wrap your scarves?  What is your favourite scarf/accessory?
My favorite way is when I get a “chassidic” look, with a lot of volume – like the Breslev women do. My favorite scarves change from time to time, but it is always an item which I like for being comfortable more than the colour or any other criteria. I have many accessories and I also make some (such as the brooch on the pink-and-gray do photograph). I don’t know if I have a favorite, but there are some I wear often like the bobby pin with the creamflower on the mint green-and-maroon look.
What are you wearing on your head today?
I haven’t gotten dressed yet, so I am still wearing the dark green berret I sleep in.
Do you have any stories (funny, meaningful) you would like to share about hair covering?
I don’t have many stories, though I do remember as an inexperienced newlywed wearing a silk scarf to shul.  It slipped off and I ran out to rearrange it. I also remember at my wedding, during the dancing, knocking the hat off my newly married friend. You can see it quite clearly in the DVD. She doesn’t wear hats anymore…
Before I gave birth 4 months ago, I had a serious discussion with a friend about what to cover my head with in the delivery room. We decided on either a berret or a snood (I love charedi snoods – very lite and comfortable) or a very comfy tichel. When the time came it was shabbat morning, and I couldn’t stand the thought of getting in the ambulance in plain clothes. So I put on a shabbat dress, tied a sparkly shabbat tichel with a lace ribbon and got on the ambulance. I only changed in the delivery room.
batsheva lady wrap star wrapunzel
What are you grateful for right now? 
I am grateful for the biggest treasures Hashem has given me. A lovely supportive kind-hearted husband, and my two beautiful daughters, aged seven years and four months old, and for the being a stay-at-home mom. I am grateful for the lovely house we have built recently in which we live, and for our loving families and friends.
Thanks for giving me this opportunity for self reflection. It was very interesting.  Have a lovely day!!

The Wonder Scarf

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Daily Scarf Creation7 Comments

I always appreciate scarves that make your wraps look much more intricate than they actually are.  Scarves that have multiple patterns and colours do this job very well as you can see in the following photos:

Yes, this is just one scarf, tied in the simplest long scarf wrap (see tutorial here).  A beautiful beaded pin finishes off the look and the final result is something that looks much more complicated than it actually is.  Yay!

Brrrr…

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Daily Scarf Creation1 Comment

It’s cold, I needed to wrap something quickly, and I’m going to be outside quite a bit today.  So of course, a pashmina is exactly what I need to wear!  (See tutorial on how to wrap pashminas here.)  I especially like this one because it’s so soft, warm, and the colour is beautiful.  A pretty antique-y pin pulls the look together perfectly.

Sunrise Hues

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Daily Scarf Creation7 Comments

There was a time when I went through a contrasting colour phase;  All the colours I wore had to be contrast with each other, especially the ones on my head!  Blue and orange, yellow and purple, green and pink, etc. would all make bold appearances together.  However, lately I am going through a monochromatic phase where I will pair together blue and green, purple and navy, red and orange, and pink with blush.  Today was no exception!  What colour pairings are you loving lately?

Lady Wrap Star Anna!

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Lady Wrap Stars5 Comments

Meet this week’s Lady Wrap Star!  I used to call Anna my mentor, and now I am very proud to call her my friend!  I made sure to ask her some specific questions about Judaism and hair covering, since many of you have asked.  For those of you that don’t know, many Jewish women also cover their hair with wigs (sheitels).  Anna covers with both wigs and scarves, and refers to both in the questions she answered.  And yes, in one of the photos she sent, that is me standing beside her before I started covering my hair.  Anna and her husband, Marc, and twin girls, Nechama and Zissie live in Toronto.  When you are finished reading her interview (and checking out her lovely head coverings), you should take a look at her blog called Double the Fun We Are One 🙂

Anna Marc Tichel

Lady Wrap Star also know as: 
Anna Sherman

Tell us a bit about yourself!  How do you choose to spend your time?
Thank G-d, my life is filled with things that I love!  Most of my time is spent taking care of my 9-month old twins, Nechama and Zissie, working on my Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy to become a marriage therapist in Boulder, running our household, preparing Shabbos for our many special guests, working on shidduchim (matchmaking) and writing for my blog.  When I do find some time to myself, I run out to Zumba class, spend time alone with my awesome hubby or meet a friend for coffee.

What is the best thing that has happened to you today?
My daughter, Nechama gave me a hug and a kiss!

How long have you been covering?
Since the day I got married, almost three years.

What is the one thing that you like best about covering your hair?
For me, covering my hair is about more than just the actual halacha (Jewish law) of covering.  My hair was always something I loved about myself and something that made me feel more attractive to the world, especially to other men.  My husband really loved my hair when we were dating and would always compliment me on it.  The act of covering my hair is about saving that special and unique part of my identity just for my husband.  Covering my hair identifies me as a married woman to the rest of the world and I’m proud of that!  I’m extremely proud to be married to my husband, for people to know that I am his wife and I am proud that we have an amazing marriage.  The first week of our marriage when we went out in public, my husband looked at me and said,” I love that you are covering your hair and the whole world sees it.  I love that they know that you are my wife and I am so proud to be your husband!”

Can you tell us a bit about Judaism and why you cover your hair?
The halacha about a married woman covering her hair comes from the story in the Torah about the Aishes Sotah, the adulterous woman.  In the story of the Aishes Sotah, the Torah states that she is forced to stand up in front of the entire community and if she is found guilty, she is put in the most embarrassing situation.  Her cap is removed, and her hair is unbraided and exposed in front of the entire community.  From this story,we learn that a married woman’s hair is covered in public and that it is embarrassing for her to uncover her hair in front of others.  There is much halachic discussion regarding what is the appropriate way for a woman to cover her hair and how much hair needs to be covered.  Some say, she only needs to cover the crown of her head, some say all her hair needs to be covered, others say that a tefach (hand breadth may be showing.)  I personally feel that the amount of hair and the way a married woman chooses to cover her hair is a very personal decision that should be made by the woman herself.  A woman’s hair is part of her identity, as is the way she covers it.  The way she chooses to cover it is an extremely personal decision which happens to be made very public.  Therefore, I think that everyone needs to refrain from judgment and respect a woman for the choices she makes regarding how she covers her hair.

Any funny/vivid hair covering experiences that you would like to share?
One hair covering experience that vividly stands out in my mind is when I made the choice to uncover my hair.  Sounds crazy, right?  You see, before Marc, I was previously married to someone else for one year.  It was a bad situation and I was lucky to get out of it unharmed, with no children.  I always covered my hair during my first marriage and when I got divorced, I was faced with the decision whether I would continue to cover it (as many divorced women do) or chose to uncover it.  Shortly before I received my get (Jewish divorce) I was visiting a rabbi whom I am very close with in Toronto.  Without me asking him, he told me that I should uncover my hair when I got divorced.  He felt it was the right decision for me.  When I asked him why, he explained that for many divorce women, he felt that it was the right decision for them to keep their hair covered, especially if they had children.  However, he explained that in my case, since there had never been a real connection or a decent relationship with my first husband, it was almost as if I had never been married at all.  And since there were no children keeping me connected to him, he felt that there was no reason to hold onto any other reminders and have all these painful memories “hanging over my head.”  So the day I received my get I uncovered my hair.  It was liberating!  I felt free of this burdensome life I had been carrying around, free to be myself and alive again.  A week later, I was in a shoe store in Brooklyn and the Israeli shop owner asked me if I was single.  I said yes, and he answered “Perfect!  I have mamash excellent shidduch for you!  (I have such a good match for you.)  A wonderful Israeli boy, twenty-two years old!”  (I was twenty-seven.)
Of course, now that I am married to the right person, covering my hair has an entirely different meaning, one of pride and connection, instead of burden and hidden secrets.
The only other thing I want to add to this point, is that as I mentioned before, just like the way a woman chooses to cover her hair is a very personal decision,  so is the decision whether to uncover or to continue to cover her hair if she gets divorced.  For me, it was definitely the right decision to uncover my hair when I got divorced, however, I did receive a number of very insensitive comments from people, ranging from “Who told you it was ok to uncover your hair?”  to “You got divorced and you uncovered your hair????  We’re going to have to talk about this.  I gotta hear the whole story.”  After something as painful as a divorce, I was not in any shape to answer these questions, nor did I feel the need for everyone to be privy to my personal decision on this topic.  The best thing to do when you see a woman who just got divorced uncover her hair is to tell her she looks great and ask how she’s doing.  That’s it.  Short and simple.

What are you wearing on your head today?
A warm and cozy grey wool beret with a flower on it.

Do you remember the first time you wore a head covering?  What did it look like?  How did it feel?  What did others say?
The first time I wore a head covering after Marc and I got married was the day after our wedding and we went to meet his extended family for brunch.  I wore my beautiful, long, Shabbos shaitel (wig) and my mother-in-law said that she wouldn’t have recognized me if she walked past me on the street 😉

What is your favourite scarf?  Favourite accessory?  Favourite hat?
I don’t really have a favourite scarf, I have so many beautiful scarves which I picked up in Israel on my many visits there.  My favourite hat is a fuzzy, grey cap-style hat with a decorative ribbon flower in the front which I got in New York.

What are some of your hair covering suggestions?  Any secrets you would like to share with us?
Although I love how some women wear fancy tichels layered one on top of another, or with the volumizer underneath, I am someone who gets a lot of headaches and these fancy tichel arrangements never worked for me.  I have found that when it comes to tichels, I’m better off wearing one or two at a time, and if I want that volumized look at the back, I take a cotton cap and stuff a pair of rolled up socks in the back.  Then I tie the tichel over top of that for a more elegant look.  I also always wear a velvet headband called a wig grip under my tichels to keep them from slipping.
I find that if you choose to cover your hair with tichels or hats, earrings and make-up can make a world of difference to the way you look and feel.  The right earrings and a little make-up can brighten up your face and change your whole appearance.

What are you grateful for right now?
So many things.  Mostly my amazing husband, my beautiful girls and my supportive family and friends.

It’s the simple things…

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Daily Scarf Creation2 Comments

… that seem to get the most notice 🙂

Yesterday for a performance, I wore this square “silk” scarf (it can’t be silk… cost 10nis aka <$3 in the Jerusalem market) with a complimentary headband.  Instead of letting the tails hang down the back, I pulled them to the side.  Of course, everyone that commented on it was surprised to find out that this is something I do every day and wasn’t just for fashion.

Beautiful Brown

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Daily Scarf Creation4 Comments

I love the colour brown.  I secretly (or not so secretly) yearned for brown hair, but never coloured it because I was given such a lovely shade of blonde.  Now that I cover, I can make my head any colour that I please!

This wrap is an easy adaptation of the regal wrap.  Instead of wrapping the second strand flat over my head, I gave it a twist!

This Week’s “Lady Wrap Star” !

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Lady Wrap Stars7 Comments
Meet this week’s Lady Wrap Star and be inspired by her beautiful scarf creations!
Lady Wrap Star also known as:
Mary Burkholder:
Tell us a bit about yourself!  How do you choose to spend your time?
I work in the shipbuilding industry as a 3D AutoCad/Catia designer. When I’m not at work, I am home chasing after my two boys, ages 6 and 17 months. When my babies are asleep I enjoy crocheting and spending time with my husband.
How long have you been covering?
For about 6 months now. Prior to that, I was completely unaware of covering and it’s significance until one evening when I came across Rivka Malka’s channel on YouTube. Her tichel’s are so gorgeous, and I was completely intrigued, so I started watching her how-to video’s to see how it was done. I was instantly hooked, and the desire to cover started growing in my heart until it became something I deeply wanted to do and couldn’t stop thinking about.
What is the one thing that you like best about covering your hair?
I don’t know if this will make sense to anyone else, but there is amazing dignity that comes with covering. I’ve heard it said that it’s like a crown, and that’s probably the most accurate description I can come up with. I feel an overwhelming sense of value and love for my own self when I cover. There have been more than several times when I finish my tichel and stand back to evaluate and all I can say is ‘wow, wow, wow!’. I don’t know about the average woman, but I’d venture to say, “wow” is not an emotion we frequently experience when standing in front of our mirrors. But when you cover, it happens, and it’s surprising and pleasant.:)
The very first time I ever wore a covering here at home was on a Friday night Shabbat. It was a simple brown sparkly triangle with no volumizer or other layers, very simple. My oldest son, Caleb who was 5 at the time, came in the room where I was, took one wide-eyed look at me and said “Mom you look so beautiful, you look like Shabbat!”. With one simple comment about one simple covering, he sealed in my heart that the beauty wasn’t in how great I could get it to look, but in keeping it simple enough for my children to always be able to recognize the spirit of Shabbat in what I wore. 🙂
I notice that you wear glasses – has that affected the kinds of head coverings that you wear?
No, I don’t think it’s affected the type of coverings I wear, however when I go to choose new glasses in the very near future, how they look while I’m wearing a head covering will determine my choice.
What are you wearing on your head today?
Today I’m wearing an apron style tichel from Judith de Paris coupled with a cream colored scarf. 
wrapunzel lady wrap star mary
Do you remember the first time you wore a head covering?  What did it look like?  How did it feel?  What did others say?
Yes I do! 🙂 This wasn’t the very first time wearing a head covering, but it was the very first time wearing one to work and it was a huge, but very significant step for me. I work in an environment that is majority male, but a good amount female in my immediate group. I was self-conscious at first, but the response from my co-workers was so overwhelmingly positive, that I felt at ease very quickly. As you see in the picture, it was two Israeli tichels, one white one purple, and a multi-colored black/purple/silver scarf wrapped around. Still one of my favorite combinations!
wrapunzel lady wrap star mary
Your favourite scarf and/or accessory:
It is so hard to pick just one, but this is my favourite. It’s cream, brown and teal, with gold shimmer lurex woven throughout. I love shimmer. 🙂
Add a brown scarf and a butterfly pin that my mother gave me and now it’s really my favourite!
Could you share a unique experience (or two) that happened to you due to covering your hair?
It’s amazing the conversations that get started. I’ve had women at work thank me because now they feel free to cover, whereas before they were really concerned about what the response would be.
What are some of your hair covering suggestions?  Any tips you would like to share with us?
To don’t be discouraged when you can’t seem to get it just right. I’ve turned my arms into rubber on some looks, and on others gotten it right the very first time. What’s amazing is when you find your favorite style. Mine came after I received my volumizer from Judith de Paris. How I lived without that and my velvet head band, I will never know. But it was after that point when I stopped being afraid of “too much” volume. I don’t know now if there is such a thing for my head shape. One tip for the headband is a tiny bit of mousse. My hair is super fine and sometimes, especially after the headband starts to stretch, I find that everything wants to start sliding again. I fixed this one day by getting everything pulled into the elastic band, and then smoothing a small bit of mousse all over before putting on the headband. It gives you an extra secure feeling that really does last all day.
What is your favourite colour?
Purple is top, but I gravitate a lot towards browns, blues, teals, etc 🙂
What are you grateful for right now?
I’m beyond grateful for those precious boys of mine sleeping peacefully in the next room. I could kiss those noggins right off.
And today especially, I’m grateful for answered prayers. For a G-d who not only sees and hears, but responds. I’m super grateful today 🙂

Ballerina bun!

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Daily Scarf CreationLeave a comment

Inspired by my dancer friend, I decided to try a high bun wrap for today:

To do this one, just make sure that you have your hair (or volumizer or whatever) high up on your head, then tie one square scarf in a basic tucked in wrap.  Then I took an israeli scarf, folded it up and wrapped it around the bun part, tucking the ends in 🙂

The Switcheroo

On By Andrea GrinbergIn Daily Scarf Creation4 Comments

So… I started the day off with a beautiful navy and turquoise wrap:

But someone (*cough) didn’t account for the purse/backpack straps that I would be taking on and off all day, so a switch was needed because the hanging tails kept getting tangled. Luckily I brought along a hat!  So now the rest of the day will be spent in this:

I really like this hat!  It matches so much of my wardrobe and is the perfect size.

Hope you’re all having a lovely day!